September 26, 2001

Its hard to believe that this wonderful experience call Miles for Meagan is over.

Yesterday we were met at Nathan Phillips Square to a band playing and people in such a joyous mood. It rained for the entire trip through Toronto and into the Square but once we arrived the skies cleared as if to say that only sunshine would bless our closing event.

So many emotions have filled our journey and so many people have have been touched by the work that our team set out to achieve. Last evening I was met by Chuck and Marie from New York State who travelled to Toronto to be there when we finally finished our mission. Marie has been fighting the beast for several years. There were also other women at the Square who are fighting the beast and many of them came up to me to talk about how Miles for Meagan was so important them. One woman proudly wore her wig and we talked about her battle. She is a statistic who defies the odds. She's been fighting for 15 years!! Chemo after chemo and she was still smiling and enjoying the day. Celebrating with us the end of an incredible journey. I cannot imagine the strength that it takes to battle the beast for 15 years. That's what Miles for Meagan is really all about though, isn't it. It's not about the riding or the fundraising or the weather - its about the women who suffer at the hand of the beast. It's about those who don't know about the beast and those who will learn about the beast. It's about the families.

Today I learned that my friend Chipper lost her mom to the beast just the other day. Another body taken but another spirit that lives on in defiance. Together we can make a difference. I know that together we can beat this beast. For me Miles for Meagan is our expression of this victory. It's a small way for us to work together so that others can win. Thank you Meagan for teaching me a very important lesson.

Michael

September 24, 2001

We are in Oshawa with all of the hard riding behind us. Last evening we pulled into Memorial Park in downtown Oshawa and were met by several women who are directly affected by the beast. Mothers, daughters and a very courageous survivor. I was very touched by their spirit and know exactly what each one of them is going through. The desperation inflicted on families by the beast is almost too much to bear but each one of us will move forward. The human spirit is an incredible thing.

I cannot thank this very special group of riders and supporters enough. We had a few frustrating moments as the tour began but over the past seven days the group and the tour has become an incredible thing. The message has gotten out there. That's exactly what I envisioned when we began. This could only be done by the commitment of the people who dedicated their time, their pain and their spirit on the tour. When the message made it to the floor of the House of Commons I knew that we had achieved something important.

Today we ride to Markham. We made a miscalculation in the overall mileage of the tour. We have already ridden 650 kilometers. So I guess the overall tour distance will work out to closer to 750 kilometers. The next two days will be a breeze for riding. 50k - 60k per day. Geez - did we ever think that two 60k days in a row would be relaxing?!

Michael

September 22, 2001

Today was tough but before I get in to that lets talk about yesterday.

Grant and Shelly McKenna and Kathryn Hanaford joined us in Kingston for the days ride. They were all amazing people and pretty good riders to boot. Grant works at Lafarge Cement and organized a fund raising drive at the plant that he works at in Bath. When we passed the plant there were close to 50 plant employees out on the road cheering the team on. Wow! When we passed through the town of Bath there were two road signs cheering on the team. It was great.

Kathryn has done a lot to support the ride too. Actually she has been incredible. She organized a draw and raised almost $2,000 for the Meagan Fund. It was great to have the fresh legs along to help out the team. It was a whole lot of fun having some new personalities on the team for the day.

Now for today. Today was he toughest day of riding that I have ever done. It was steep climbs for about ninty kilometers with a total distance of 130 kilometers. It would be far too easy to cheer the really good riders but I think the real heroes today were the less experienced riders and of course AJ Perrie who rollerbladed. Zina Vesterman has done distance in the past but she told me that she has broken every record that she has ever had for herself on every day of the ride. Today she entered a realm that I am sure she never contemplated. I asked her back at the hotel how she felt and she waved her hand as if to say "No Problem!". At seventy kilometers in and after some serious climbs and steady headwinds Chris Nadeau was looking a little flushed so I asked her if she would like to take a break and ride in the van. Her response - "I've already ridden this far so I am fininshing this thing, dammit!" Margaretha Burnett was amazing today. I have noticed her style has steadily evolved over the past few days and she makes things look so easy but I know that girl worked today. She taunted the "boys club" back at the hotel with "What? You found that tough?" Some really amazing determination out there today.

As the ride continues I know that it could not have worked so well if it were not for the very strong help of some real dedicated people. People like Moira Jenkins and Fenella Townsend at the National Ovarin Cancer Association. Elisabeth Ross the excecutive Director of NOCA. And lets not forget our den mother Jane Ann Murray who has kept us hopping at every turn. Our road crew Jack, Sheila and Alex have done an incredible job at making sure the team stays watered and fueled and most importantly - safe.

I must also mention our incredible sponsors PharmaPlus and Astra Zeneca. Without them this event simply would not be possible. At every little town along the route where there has been a PharmaPlus store they have proudly displayed the Miles for Meagan poster and collected donations for the cause.

Without the help of Nicola at National Labrador Communications and Emily at Holmes Communications and the incredible creative talents of Danielle and Kelly at IDV8 website design there is no way that we would have been able to get our message out there. You guys have been there since the beginning and I really want to thank you.

Michael

Dave Elphick here - lots of great riding, lots of great events, happenings, jokes, stories, lies, bigger lies, meals, and more meals. So happy to be here and able to support the effort. As someone else said this trip - I feel guilty doing this, it's so much fun. Meagan is in our hearts as we ride but we all feel great about the impact that this ride has and will have for the future of research for early detection, medication, and all that can snowball from such advancements. We're out here having a ball and raising awareness for our cause - what a combination. Adrianne, Mimi, and Rosie - I miss you and love you. D.

Mark Chandler - Great cycling, great cause, great people, great big gusts of headwinds. This has been a fantastic journey so far and an opportunity to hear many stories on the road. The people at NOCA and all those who organized this event are going above and beyond with everything. Thinking about the boys and when they can do something similar with me some day... (ok not all the same things)... hope all's well there Eric & Owen...love Dad.

Zina Vesterman - I to am very honored to be part of this tour. I meet wonderful people, have a great time and am glad that I have made my small contribution to this cause. Today was a tough day: hills, headwinds, but I managed to cover 100 km. To my lovely daughters Zhanna and Ilana: Always say I can and you will. Love, Ma.

Murray Browne - I feel very fortunate to be part of this event. It was bad time for me, what with building a new home and being busy at work etc. but I wouldn't have missed it for the world. I really wanted to support Mike, M-L, and NOCA. I remember going over to visit Meagan when she was battling back from some rough chemo sessions. She was always bright and sunny and kept asking me if I had brought any baked goodies. We have a great group of people on this tour to honour her memory and raise awareness and funds. I felt rather wimpy riding in the van today as a result of a cold, pulled muscles etc. when so many other people suffer through so much. Fortunately, Memet carried the Burnett/Browne banner and rode the whole way in good spirits. I am very proud of her. I did my best to contribute and drive the van and sneak people treats to supplement the Power Bars. It's amazing to watch a group of people support each other through 120 km of grueling hills. It's been a great event...

A.J. Perrie - Awareness is growing and so is the swelling in my two feet, but the cost is minimum. I would like to invite all inline skaters to join me on Tuesday in Markham to skate the last leg in support for Miles For Meagan. Go Team NRS & Wolverines.

Margaretha Burnett - Today was the longest, hilliest, but not wettest or windiest day yet. A challenge by any measure. I rode with Christine and laughed through beautiful, rolling countryside and trees on the verge of blushing very scarlet. As official ex-vet I feel obliged to give an animal sitings update which is as follows: 10 barking dogs, 0 chasing dogs, 10 swan planters, 1 plaster albino cow, 1 pig of the same, 2 lawn deer, 5 dead frogs, 2 dead snakes, 4 dead coons, 1 dead unidentifiable songbird (?? warbler?) 8 horses and 89 cows. It's been a great trip so far. Ony 100 km tomorrow they tell me... I'm off to bed to rest up. Sov sa gott.

Rich Levesque - Today was my longest ride to date. It was heavy on the hills and the wind, but, also heavy on the enjoyment factor. It is very exhilerating joining a group of people who you previously only knew through the internet, and doing something very interactive, achieving a common goal. Having a blast.

Dorothy Kosciuch - On Saturday September 22/01 I joined the Miles for Meagan Bike Tour. In the first minutes of the ride I saw myself surrounded by blue and yellow jerseys. I felt this overwhelming privilege and excitement to be a part of this worthy cause. I was told that we did 125 km today. This is the most mileage that I have ever done in one day. I am tired, but proud...

Jack - my foot is on the gas... leading the pack at twenty K or less... I do water, Gatorade, ice and garbage too... great time!!!!

Sheila - Helping Jack follow the map, watching the dial, my foot on the brake too... What a team!!!!!

Mike Comello - As I pulled on my yellow and blue jersey for the first time today to start my journey on the Miles for Meagan tour I was reminded of how much I loved being part of a team. Riding in a pace line staring at the wheel in front, no worries, no thoughts just pedal, pedal, pedal. Can't wait for tomorrow!

Randy Mulder - Having a great time. The cameraderie is something else and while the skill levels are varied I believe everyone has found their level of comfort. I feel honoured to be included in the first of what, it sounds like, will become an annual event. I think we are all hurting a little but in no way comparable to the hurt ovarian cancer causes to thousands each year. I know that we are making a difference and thanks to all who cheer us on along the way. Hi Carol, Alex & Miranda, love you guys.

Mary Lynn - Ouch! I recently passed the national CMA exam for my accounting designation - I think I should have been asked to total the kilometres! We are not riding 650 km, it's more like 745! I took part of yesterday off - it was a 130 km day on a very hilly stretch - after 40 km I was completely exhausted; It was good to have the time to recover; I will still be able to say that I rode 650 km even though I knocked off 90 km from my total. Hello to my friends on Van. Isle! Hello Billie-Jo, Simon, Kimm and my darling Madison - we'll see you soon. Happy 6th Birthday Madison!!!!

Chris Nadeau - Well, we were making great music together, gears changing in unison, knees up and down peddling in rhythm... until yesterday, the disc suddenly started skipping... "Over Hill Over Hill Over Hill"! Great ride so far, great team, great weather - see you in TO soon!

Mary Rhodes - Wow !! What a day!! I met this great team last night at Peterborough Arms and before I knew it Jane Anne & Dorothy had me suited up and ready to ride. Well, I matched, but the rolling hills and beautiful scenery had me lagging behind, not to mention, my sore behind. What a great spirit these people have. I have been overwelmed with their hospitality and scense of teamwork. I've been blown away. As I chugged along up those hills I kept repeating Yes, I can, Yes I can. Being surrounded with such wonderful people, the sunshine on us, I'm feeling very honored to be included with such angels. I'll certainly be back next year to be a part of such a cause.

Jane Anne Murray - What an amazing day... more than half way... almost everything on schedule and just as we have planned... It is the reality of all work behind the scenes coming to BE... that stream of riders with the two vans... our sponsors all cheering us on as we pass and pick up supplies... it really is a Team come true... and I am so proud of everyone... we are almost there... Hope there are tons of friends and families going to greet these amazing people as they arrive in Nathan Phillips square... See ya there...

September 21, 2001

Yesterday was as promised - brutal! Our riders pushed themselves through headwinds with gusts up to 60 kph accentuated with driving rains. Even with the weather the team pulled together in a few distinct pace lines and still managed an amazing 25 kph average for the day.

I found myself with the lead pack for most of the day, and soon felt the twenty year spread in the riders. We were in a line of six riders taking turns at the lead and pushing along quite nicely. My favorite position is at the tail of the pace line - I like it there so much that the lead guys were starting to call me the "Moose Caboose". I'm happy to wear the handle if it means I get more drafting time. At the last big hill into Kingston, Randy Mulder and I started to fall back a bit from the lead pack. I asked Randy "Feeling your age yet?" His prompt reply: "YUP!"

Murray Browne has been suffering a bad cold for the past couple of days. He's a trooper though and has refused to ride in the van. If he isn't feeling better today I'm sure that Margaretha will have something to say about where he rides.

Today the weather looks good. A little wind - but not bad. We have a few new riders joining the team for the day. It will be nice to have some fresh legs along.

Michael

September 20, 2001

We woke up this morning to the tail end of Hurricane Gabriel. Rain, stiff winds out of the southwest. Looks like it is going to be a bit of a day - as they say. They have another saying in this part of the country too. "Rain before seven, sunny at eleven." Lets hope!

Yesterday our team rode 94 kilometers and we were off the road by 1:30 - wow. The team enjoyed a beautiful ride with the St. Lawrence Seaway on our left the whole way down the road. As we approached Brockville we were met by the police and escorted into the sleepy downtown core. The police decided that sirens should be turned on at times so it was sort of parade like. It was just a little overwhelming for one or two of our riders.

I have noticed that the team seems to be getting stronger. The jet lag has worn off and everyone is feeling better. This has translated into a definite increase in the pace of the ride.

Today... well lets hope that those seven/eleven words hold true.

Michael

September 18, 2001

Today Team Miles for Meagan headed out of Ottawa to begin our journey. The riders were anxious to start and getting a few kilometers under everyone's belt was just what the doctor ordered. Four MPs, who made sure that they were with us at 8:30am at our downtown Ottawa rallying spot, were there to send off the team.

MP John Cummins whose wife was taken by ovarian cancer in 1988, MP Elsie Wayne who was an absolute hoot-she wants the tour to be riding in New Brunswick next year, MP Diane Ablonczy and MP Carol Skelton who is a survivor of Ovarian Cancer.

I was quite touched by Carol Skelton's words particularly when she said that her response to people who ask about her cancer is. "We are doing just fine." That was an obvious reference to the fact that women living with the disease are always vigilant and never take their eye off the beast.

The route from Ottawa to Cornwall was 116 kilometres. Longer than most of our riders have ever rode in one day. We managed the ride in less than 5 hours with most of our team saying that they could easily ride more. Well, they will get their chance on the next leg. Day one shouldn't be a problem. Lets see how everyone does on days 2, 3, 4, 5...

I was a little worried about some of our riders earlier on in the day but as the day passed on things seemed to work out just fine. Our roller blader, AJ Perrie had numb feet at the end of the day. Alex Morrison is riding with aero bars and has learned the fine art of drafting and has found that I am the best wind block on the tour. At one point he was so close that I thought that at any moment I might be getting to know the aero bars intimately, with those aero bars soooo no tooooo close. Many people have been honking their horns and yelling "Right On!" as they pass us by and for the most part the auto traffic has been very considerate.

I should really mention how great the police have been. The Ottawa city cop who led us out of town went way outside his jurisdiction until the OPP picked us up and followed the team right into Cornwall. Our Support team have been doing 'Listen to the Whispers' talks at health centers along the route and were kept very busy yesterday getting the word out.

The tour has started off well.

Michael

September 17, 2001

Today was quite hectic. First we went to to Parliament Hill for photos and to meet some of the MPs who were getting ready for the opening of Parliament. The Honourable Jane Stewart spoke for the Government of Canada and wished us well on our journey. She spoke quite knowledgeably about ovarian cancer and mentioned that we should all be concerned about finding a cure for the beast.

Our team of riders are still working out the "team riding" concept. As we headed off down Rideau Street towards "the Hill" the team got a little wonky with riders taking up different lanes, getting out ahead of the vans, riding down the sidewalks and generally causing havoc for a few minutes on the streets of Ottawa. A little refresher on the "team ride" rules backed up by our very knowledgeable police and the team shaped up quite fine.

We proceeded to the American Embassy about 10:30am and place sunflowers at the Embassy gates and the whole team signed the book of condolences. It was quite moving to be there. John Bednar commented that he could feel that the energy at the embassy and around all the flowers that thousands had left was strong.

Over the lunch hour our team donned their yellow jerseys and passed out more than a thousand brochures about Miles for Meagan and ovarian cancer. We spread a lot of news today.

Our team is getting just a little anxious to get pedaling. Tomorrow we ride 110k to Cornwall.

Michael

September 16, 2001

Well here we are in Ottawa. Almost everybody is here. Alex Morrison, Margaretha Burnett and Murray Browne have had to rearrange their flight arrangements after the shocking events in Washington and New York. We had some discussion about last week's event and were unsure about whether or not to proceed but in the end we all agreed that Miles for Meagan is about Hope and we can all use a little hope right now.

Our team is meeting each other for the first time today and can already tell that there are going to be a lot of friendships developing over the next few days. Dave Elphic, Rob Bednar, Rich Levesque and I went out for a quick 25k ride this afternoon. I haven't been on the bike in about a week and felt that I should get in a warm-up ride. (Mental note to self: Don't try to stay with the 26 and 30 year old skinny riders!) It was a beautiful ride along the Rideau River. Randy Mulder printed up a few Miles for Meagan business cards that simply read "Beat the Beast - Ovarian Cancer - Log on Join in" and then the website address on the back. I brought a handful with me on the ride and passed them around when our more youthful riders slowed down enough. One young woman of about twenty was sitting at the curbside just watching the world go by and I could not resist giving her a card. She was just young and beautiful and with a great big world ahead of her. I asked her if she had access to the internet and she did and said she would take a peek at the website.

Driving back along some of the route that we will travel I can see that it is going to be a very beautiful ride but I could not help but notice that the wind was blowing about 20 knots west to east off Lake Ontario. Headwinds for sure - I think I'll draft behind some of the younger guys in the big winds - let's call it a twenty year handicap.

We did our pre-ride briefing and have been getting all the bikes together. We all went to a buffet for supper tonight. Everyone had seconds - some had thirds - everyone had dessert. Do ya think they are loading up for the ride?

Michael

September 8, 2001

This is our last weekend of training before the team heads out to Ottawa. Last night Alex Morrison, one of our tour elders, sent me an email that kind of said it all for me. He was thinking of doing a 100K today and pushing a little harder. I suggested a smaller ride and some healing to build strength for the really big ride. I think we are all trying to pack in that last bit of training. After all, for most of our team they will never have done anything like this before.

I'm sure that I am driving our event organizers just a little bit crazy with all the last minute stuff. They are a great group of people who are absolutely committed to ensuring that it all works out well.

Four more training days and then I will learn about the fine art of packing a road bike into a suitcase and stowing it under the seat in front of me on the plane. That's how they do it right?

I have learned some more sad news about the beast today. My friend Chipper has been a caregiver for her Mom for some time now. Her Mom has been suffering with bowel blockages and the doctors have told her that she has now run out of medical options. They have engaged the hospice people to help out now. Chipper writes that she has become one "mouthy broad" in the past few days spreading the news about Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month and talking to anyone who asks (and many who don't) about the beast. Bowel blockages are a particularly insidious part of they way the beast attacks women. They effectively bock the bowel from working and are incredibly painful. Meagan suffered terribly from these. She would sometimes go for very long times without being able to eat at all because of the blockages. I will send a prayer and my very best thoughts for Chipper and her Mom.

Well, September 17th is just around the corner. I hope we get a lot of people out to Parliament Hill to kick off Miles for Meagan and I know that all those last minute details will work themselves out.

Michael

September 4, 2001

Here we are at September 4th already! Now we are down to days and counting. The Ontario Provincial Police have sent our final route plan along. A few new twists and turns based on their experience with Ontario roads but they look interesting and welcome.

There are so many things that I had no idea about when you mount a challenge like this. One of which is that the police have a very big say about where the ride will be. They have been great though and I'm sure that it is no small task to sort out a bicycle route for a group of riders who really don't know what they are getting themselves in to. The police have graciously agreed to keep us all safe on the ride by following along. I will have to remember to thank them in a big way. There have been so many people who have helped out so much. There are radio stations that have put the Miles for Meagan website on their site, there are community newspapers and cycling clubs, bicycle associations, cancer awareness groups and just a host of people who have been helping by getting the word out there. It makes me feel that we really are doing the right thing.

When Meagan was first diagnosed I turned to the internet to see what I could find out about the beast. I spent a lot of time researching treatments and support groups. I came upon a group of caregivers and women who were fighting the beast and who were supporting each other through a simple message board system on the internet. So much information and emotion is shared on that website. Women who are fighting for and in some cases losing their lives share their battles, their fears and their triumphs. Caregivers who fight for and support their loved ones share their hopes with friends who are doing the same. They truly are an amazing group of people and their guidance helped me through some of our darkest times. I still visit and talk with these old friends.

The other day I dropped by to see who was in and found that a kind of revolution was happening. It really blew me away. These women and caregivers have challenged each other for Ovarian Cancer Awareness month to get on their bikes and their stationary cycles and into their walking shoes and walk, cycle and stationary bike for Miles for Meagan. In some cases these are women who are undergoing chemo therapy right now and they want to find a moment or two in their day or in their week to celebrate with us. To be a part of Miles for Meagan.

It is not lost on me that this is the cancer that whispers and that many of these physical challenges will go unnoticed by anyone but their closest companions. In a way they are whispering their defiance in the face of the beast. One very brave woman wrote that she wanted to participate but that she would only be able to ride once every two weeks because her chemo regime would not allow otherwise. I know how this woman must feel. I saw this in Meagan. Each ounce of physical exertion must be carefully planned because frankly there is not much left after surviving the onslaught of chemical intervention that the chemo really is. All I can say to each one of these heroes is - BRAVO! BRAA-VO!

I have some very nice news. Our team of dreamers now includes a three new additions. Zina Vesterman from Toronto and Alex Morrison from Edmonton. Both of these riders bring a little more maturity to our team and will be our resident, riding elders. At the other end of the scale AJ Perrie has joined our team with a different kind of twist. AJ is the Canadian National Junior Marathon In-line Skating Champ (what a handle) and he is going to roller blade the whole route. He tells me that he is going to give our riders a run for their money. His coach and father Alex will join him on the tour as one of our support drivers. Welcome to the team guys!

Michael

August 26, 2001

Three weeks until the ride begins. Am I scared? You bet!! I keep having this voice ring through my head - its Mary Lynn "Why 650 kilometres Michael? Why not 300 or even 500? What's with this 650 kilometre thing?" I'm not doubting myself I know that we can all do it but... Why did I pick 650 kilometres. Sore butts and lots of grunts every molehill looking like a mountain and me knowing all they way that I'm not 30 anymore or even 40 anymore. Just keep telling yourself Mike - "You can do it. You can do it. You can do it." Well the fact is that I have developed some calluses in some very interesting locations. I'm ready!!

I have been getting emails and messages from a lot of people about the Miles for Meagan ride. Messages from women who are fighting the beast right now. They tell me that they feel that their voice is being heard through the ride. That is so great. That's one of the most important things for me. People need to know that there are so many women, our mothers, ours sisters, our grandmothers and our daughters who are fighting right now. They are going through the exact same suffering that Meagan did and they all have HOPE.

Some people have wondered if I am angry about what happened to Meagan and I can honestly say that I don't have an angry bone in my body about what happened to Meagan. She fought her battle with grace, dignity and hope. Somehow I know that she would not want me to be angry. There is no question that I have been forever profoundly changed by Meagan and what she went through. We all have. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about her. About her life, about her smiles, about the happy times about her struggle and about how much I miss her but never do I have an angry feeling about it.

I was thinking tonight about some of our times with Meagan and I thought about being a bit angry with when she was 14 and jumped out her bedroom window late one night to visit friends. I was out of town on business at the time. Mary Lynn called up the neighbours and mounted a full scale search of all the usual hang-outs only to finally give up and go home to wait for her. When she got back home there was Meagan sitting in her room like nothing in the world was amiss. We all had a good laugh about that when she was older. No, I can honestly say that I am not angry about this - I am resolved to let people know about the beast and I know that Meagan is helping us in a very special way.

Michael

August 15, 2001

A sad bit of news today. Serena and Sarah Mitchell have had to leave our team for this year. They had originally planned to ride as Team Barbara in honour of their mother who was taken by the beast this past spring. I know well the pain of losing a precious person to this awful disease. Serena told me that when she first heard about Miles for Meagan that she was excited to be a part of the team but as time has moved on they find themselves not quite ready. I understand completely and I look forward to seeing them in Toronto when we arrive and maybe next year we will see the Mitchell sisters riding bikes for Team Barbara.

We're going to miss you Serena and Sarah.

On another note we have had a couple new additions to our team. Mark Chandler from Toronto and Mike Comello from Oshawa. Welcome you guys.

I have been hearing from a few people that they want to organize one day events in their communities during the week that we will be riding. I think that is great.

Our team is starting to get in shape despite some weekend accidents one of which involved me tackling Mary Lynn at 22 kph - OUCH! Mary Lynn got some bruised knees and sports injury bragging rights. Its a long story. Suffice it to say that I will not be following Mary Lynn so closely from now on.

Michael

August 9, 2001

Wow - just over a month to go before Miles for Meagan begins. People from many places have visited the website. Donations have come in from as far away as Australia. I know that a lot of people are starting to get the message out there about this ride and wanting to participate in any way that they can. That is really great.

I can hardly believe how seriously the riders have taken up the cause. We are coaching each other along through emails as if we were about to undertake some great competition like the Tour de France. The riders are really putting themselves through their paces and taking their training pretty serious. I guess we'll all be in pretty good bike shape after this. My daughter, Billie-Jo is living in Toronto and was asking me if I had lost any of that midlife spread yet. I guess it took a lot of hard work to pack that extra load on and, as Mary Lynn says, 'It ain't comin' off easy.' Oh well, I know that I am getting in bike shape and if they ever have a middle-age, Clydesdale event on the Tour de France I'll be there.

One of the truly amazing things to me is the fundraising activities that some of our riders are organizing. Making up posters and getting the word out about ovarian cancer in their own workplaces. I find that to be so nice. One of our riders put together a poster for work using some of the pictures and information from the website and added a nice Bianchi road bike. He then told me that he loved Italian road bikes and hey he was Italian too. Too funny! Some of our riders have been assigning themselves nicknames like 'Tailspin' and 'Workin-up-to-it' and 'Bonk'. Everyone's learning to push their limits in anticipation of some pretty long days in the saddle. Because we all live in different parts of the country most of our coaching is on-line. Emails flying back and forth bragging about riding a quick 70k today or 100k yesterday. Beating up the prairie or fighting the aphid storm in Toronto. It really quite amazing to me.

I am so happy that people are having a lot of fun with this. I know that Meagan would also think that it is a fun thing. She'd still think that we are all just a little bit crazy (don't all teenagers?) but she would definitely be giving us one of those great big sunshine smiles.

Michael

August 2, 2001

It looks like Miles for Meagan is really gaining steam. Mary Lynn said to me last night that Meagan would probably give us one of her "You guys are weird" lines. That was one of her favourite ways of letting us know that she liked what we were doing. Going out for a ride, working in the yard together or just about any such couple thing. I know she would be happy about getting the message out about the beast.

I have this vision of dozens of people joining us for an hour or a day or more and riding along with us. A community of riders sharing a common cause that grows with each passing day that the ride continues. Every day people joining the ride as we go through the communities and pushing us to complete our mission. That would be a real neat thing.

Michael

July 25, 2001

On Sunday July 22nd my friend Laurie passed away. Another victim of the beast we call Ovarian Cancer. She was nobody famous. Just a person who was caught by the terrible circumstance of cancer. Her friends and family gathered to see her off and now the healing for those left behind begins.

This is the way it is for many on this terrible journey. Our mothers, our sisters, our daughters. The rate at which this disease takes these women staggers me. When I hear about someone being diagnosed with ovarian cancer I immediately get that sinking feeling because I know what the odds of survival are. It is the exception, not the rule that people who get ovarian cancer survive to live long lives.

Today I celebrate Laurie and Ange. Nobody famous but somebody very courageous.

Michael

July 20, 2001

It's funny what happens to you when cancer comes into your life. You open your eyes and what you see before you are many people who fight a valiant battle with the Beast. You meet people who suffer the relentless progress of the disease with only Hope and each other. I've met many of these people since our Meagan began and finished her battle with the Beast.

One such friend is Laurie and her caregiver and life partner Ange. Laurie has seen the worst that the Beast can give. She has suffered the side effects of chemotherapy, the horrific impacts of the disease on the body and the unbearable pain that comes with each new onslaught that the Beast dishes out.

Today my friends Laurie and Ange are facing the end of the battle. The Beast lays ready to conquer Laurie's body but never her spirit. Ange and Laurie today face that gentle time when they look ahead to what the spirit provides. In a very short time they will say their good byes for now. And Laurie's spirit will be free from the torment that the Beast has wrought upon her for more than two years. It must be stopped.

Michael

July 17, 2001

It's hard for me to believe how far Miles for Meagan has come. I know that Meagan would be quite surprised at all the attention — probably just a little embarrassed and, in her own way, excited about the possibilities.

The end of June was a tough time for all of us here. It was just a year ago since Meagan's diagnosis and the real tough journey that we all travelled began. So much has happened in only one year. It's hard to put into perspective just what life can bring to you in just a short time. So much living, so much hope and so much tragedy.

The more I think about this past year the more realize just how much Meagan has taught me. My faith in the human spirit has never been stronger. My belief in the strength of family and the support of friends has been forever altered. It really is true that you find out who you are closest to when something as profound as this comes into your life.

The riders for Miles for Meagan are getting busy training and, in some cases, wondering how they will achieve what will be the biggest fitness challenge that they have ever undertaken. Frankly I'm wondering that about myself too. Training, training, training has become our mantra. My last big ride was two years ago and was six days down the Oregon Coast. This ride will be a little different - a bit longer, but not quite as mountainous. I'm sure that we will all do just fine.

I'm looking forward to the community events along the way and spreading the word about this terrible beast. People need to know about this killer that whispers.

Michael

June 5, 2001

It's been about a year since we started to get really worried about Meagan. She had been complaining about her stomach and was starting to show signs that something was wrong. At first nobody really knew what to make of things but it was obvious that something was not right.

Meagan, I guess like a lot of 18-year-old girls didn't really like doctors and it was like pulling teeth at first. Once at the doctor though things seemed to go quickly. The farther she went and the more doors that she opened the more frightened she became.

By the time that the trail of doctors ended up at a gynecological oncologist Meagan was in full-blown fight. I knew though that she would gather the courage to move forward. I knew that she would take every step that she had to. She was always like that though.

By the time that she first walked into the hospital for surgery at the end of June we knew it was probably ovarian cancer. The doctor was quite convinced that it was a germ cell ovarian cancer, which most often strikes young women. She wanted to have a look and drain off what she suspected to be ascites. She told Meagan that she would not take her ovaries and that there would be only a small entry mark. Meagan hated the idea but as always, took another step forward. After what seemed like days the doctor come out of the surgical suite. The doctor said she drew 6 1/2 litres of ascites. I don't know why but I immediately began to think about what that would weigh. About 15 pounds. 15 pounds! That would mean that our girl weighed only 120 pounds since she weighed into the hospital at 135. She was 5'11".

Then the doctor told us that it was more serious than she suspected. She said that when she looked in with the scope she saw what seemed to be a few tumours and that she then decided to break her promise and look a little further. She saw what she described as a large number of tumours that "filled" Meagan's abdomen. There was also a large mass that had entwined in her pelvic area.

I asked her how much she had been able to remove. The shocking retort was "NONE!" Despite this the doctor remained certain that it was germ cell cancer and assured us that it was quite treatable but that it would take a lot of hard work for Meagan. There is no easy way to talk to your daughter about cancer. There is no way that you can find the words to say that will somehow make it better.

In the middle of the night Meagan awoke and giving and getting the news was so hard. In the morning the doctor came and spoke about the operation and her hopes for a successful treatment of the germ cell—Meagan was mad about the scar. Meagan may have been in pretty rough shape right then but she was still 18 and that comes with attitude. Best not to engage the beast if you can avoid it I always said.

The next day the world changed for me. It changed for all of us. Dr.Shepanski, from the Cross Cancer clinic in Edmonton was Meagan's first surgeon. She was a real great person. She came to see Meagan in the early morning and pulled me aside before going into see her. She said to me that she didn't really know how to tell me this but the news was worse than she had thought.

The assay test had come back and it was epithelial ovarian cancer - not germ cell. She had tears in her eyes when she told me. I was confused. I didn't understand. What's the difference? I guess her eyes really told me what the difference was. It was her heavy task to talk about this with Meagan. About the cancer. About the treatment. About the path that lay ahead. That day was hard for everybody. We already knew more about cancer than we had ever dreamed we would. We were all scared. I can't imagine how scared my baby girl was. Late that night Meagan and I were sitting talking a little. She was asking questions about things. She seemed somehow calm about things. "What's going to happen Dad?"

I focused on the treatment. It's the first time in my life that I really thought about Hope. I remember saying to her at that time that she was going to come through this and see the world in a way that not everybody sees it. She would understand things that the rest of us didn't understand. At 18, Meagan was facing issues that were unimaginable to most girls her age. At one point she asked me, "Will you be with me all the way Dad?" I can still hear the words and that squeaky little kid voice say "Okay" and she closed her eyes like she was confident that I would somehow keep her safe, yet I felt so helpless. When Meagan died I knew that I wanted to do something so that her promise would somehow be fulfilled. She had so much promise. I started thinking about riding a bike and spreading the word about this awful beast. And that was the start of Miles for Meagan.